How to Communicate Better with Your Grandchildren from Afar

Who wouldn’t want to be there to see their grandchild take their first step or be on stage for their first solo? But life is complicated, and geographical distance often prevents grandparents from being as involved in their grandchildren’s lives as they would like. And while it might feel like a good idea to move closer to the grandkids, that is sometimes not an option for many practical reasons.

So how do you compensate for the miles-wide chasm between you? Here are some ideas to help you stay invested and relevant in your grandchildren’s lives, even though miles may separate you.

Speak Their Language

The generational gap is never more obvious than when an older adult tries to have a conversation with a teen. If your grandchildren are in their pre-teen or teen years, you may have noticed a few “sigmas” and “skibidis” thrown into their conversation. As confusing as these slang terms are to you, they are part of your grandchild’s generational culture. It’s important to try to understand their language, not just the slang words that come out of their mouth, but the deeper meaning behind their words.

Don’t assume you know what your grandchild thinks or feels; ask them. Don’t assume their political leanings are the same as yours or even their parents. Don’t assume that they enjoy the activities they did five years ago. Learn about your grandchildren by being open-minded and humble and asking questions.

While you need to set a good example for your grandchildren, you need to have an understanding of their beliefs and their respect before your opinion will impact them.

Remember the Special Occasions

Of course, you don’t want to be in their life just on special occasions, but birthdays and Christmas are great times to make a connection with the grandchildren. These holidays allow you to give them gifts and make them feel special even though you may not be able to hug them in person.

Plan ahead to make or purchase special items you think your grandchildren will love. Ask their parents to give you ideas as to what types of things they might enjoy, and throw a few surprises in for good measure. Fill up a box with special items and mail it early so they have these reminders of your love on their special day.

How much you spend and the items you include are not nearly as important as the act of kindness you show by remembering them. If money is tight, don’t stress. You can make children feel special by video chatting with them, calling them to sing a special song, or sending them a fun and colorful card.

Create a “Thing”

You may not be there to bake cookies with your grandchildren in person, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t find your own special ways to bond. Maybe you can plan a day to bake cookies via video chat together. Or, if baking isn’t your thing, find a video game that allows you to compete against your grandchild online.

If you are musically inclined, add music to a letter written by your grandchild, or if you’re an artist, make a response piece to one of their drawings.

Put on your creative thinking cap to find ways to bond with your grandchild in a way that is meaningful to them. This may require you to go outside your comfort zone a little, but being uncomfortable is a small price to pay to find a meaningful connection with your grandbaby.

Don’t Walk Alone

If you feel a sense of sadness because of the distance between you and your grandchildren, contact a Christian counselor. During your session, you can unload your heavy emotions and find comfort as your counselor reminds you of God’s love for you.

Your counselor may also be able to give you practical tips on how to bond with your grandchildren, even at a distance, and teach you coping skills for when you feel overwhelmed by emotions.

There are so many ways to bond with your grandchildren from a distance. It may take a little creativity and time, but those moments of connection are within grasp. The love between grandparents and grandchildren will not be broken by miles.

Learn to love your grandchildren wholly and wholeheartedly through creative acts of kindness and connection. You will see that your relationships will not wither due to distance but thrive because of love.