Gift-giving during the holidays can be particularly challenging in a blended family. With varying established traditions and expectations from different households, children can become confused and receive mixed signals. Assumptions regarding established family customs may lead to potential misunderstandings. Here are some ways to help you keep your holiday season merry, bright, and drama-free.

Communication is key in gift giving

To avoid potential conflicts and ensure that everyone feels appreciated, establish clear communication with your partner and the exes involved regarding gift-giving budgets and expectations. Agree upon a reasonable spending limit for each child and discuss appropriate gifts, ensuring that no one feels overlooked.

Start the conversation early so you have time to decide on the proper gifts well in advance to avoid any last-minute scramble. Coordinate with your ex to prevent duplicate gifts. Many families choose to give joint gifts to children from both parents and stepparents, with separate gifts given by the other parent and their partner. If there is a particular gift that you both want to give to your child, consider giving it jointly and sharing the expense.

Some families cap the number of gifts each person receives or a budget they must stay within when purchasing gifts. Be mindful that your traditions and expectations might vary from that of your new family members. It’s best to have open communication about these expectations and decide early on how to approach gift-giving in the structure of your new family dynamics.

Involve the children in gift giving

Involve the children in the gift-giving process by encouraging them to create their gifts or choose gifts for each other. This will develop a sense of unity and allow them to express their understanding of each other’s interests. Personalized gifts, such as handmade crafts or thoughtful notes can carry more emotional weight than a store-bought gift and help create lasting memories.

Choosing the right gifts in a blended family

When selecting gifts in a blended family, focus more on meaningful and shared experiences than material goods. Plan activities that the whole family can enjoy together such as a staycation, special outing, or membership to a museum or theme park. Shared experiences will do more to strengthen bonds and create new traditions than something you could buy in a store.

If you are planning on purchasing gifts for each other individually it’s wise to ask everyone to write out a list of their sizes, preferred colors, or brand interests to help avoid any disappointments on Christmas Day.

If you are the stepparent, you might want to gift your stepchildren a small, thoughtful gift that comes exclusively from you along with the joint gift from their biological parent. This will show the children that you are personally invested in their lives and help to solidify or build your bond with them.

Seeking help

If you are feeling particularly overwhelmed in your new family dynamic or during the holiday season, consider scheduling a visit with a licensed therapist. Your therapist can guide you through managing your emotions and navigating the new challenges that come with blending families.

They can point you toward relevant scriptures or offer specific and practical ways to enhance your relationship with the Lord and others. Professional guidance can empower you to develop healthier relationships in your new blended family and enhance your well-being amid the complexities of family transitions and seasonal stressors. To schedule a risk-free appointment, call us today.

Photo:
“Purple Flowers on Rocks”, Courtesy of James Qualtrough, Unsplash.com, CC0 License;