Do you know yourself? At face value, this may seem a ridiculous question because you’ve spent every minute of every day with yourself. However, people can go through life without a well-defined sense of identity, and it causes problems for them. A person who doesn’t know who they are will often not know what they want, they will change their mind a lot, they find themselves changing depending on their company, and they have low self-esteem. This is where journaling comes in.

Knowing yourself has many benefits, which makes it a worthwhile pursuit. Self-reflection and journaling are two ways of understanding and knowing yourself better, and they are effective tools in helping you achieve better mental and emotional well-being.

Why It’s Hard to Know Yourself

There are many reasons why it can be hard for a person to know themselves. For instance, if a person was raised in an environment where they were neglected, over-parented, abused, overly criticized, shamed, or didn’t receive adequate encouragement, it can be difficult for them to have a strong sense of identity.

We are also shaped by our society, family, the roles we are expected to play, and the influences these communities have on us as we develop. It’s possible to receive conflicting messages from media, culture, religious institutions, and more about who you should be, what values you ought to hold, and how to feel about yourself. There can be a significant push and pull going on, which can make things quite confusing.

From a Christian perspective, these and other reasons often influence our self-knowledge. However, Scripture also adds the dimension that we don’t know ourselves because our hearts – the center of our will, thoughts, and emotions – are heavily compromised by what is displeasing to God, and we can deceive ourselves about who we are (Jeremiah 17:9-10). If we’re honest, we can all point to a time when we betrayed ourselves.

Experiences during our formative years can sow confusion and complicate our individuation. We also struggle to know ourselves because of the many voices around and within us that pull us in many different directions, and we also wrestle with our own hearts that are compromised and skewed toward doing what displeases God and is for our detriment (Ephesians 2:1-10).

Getting To Know Yourself Through Journaling

People don’t always know, or they struggle to articulate to themselves or others what they value most in life, what they need, what they fear, what matters most to them, what they desire, and what drives them. Often, people are driven from one decision or situation to another, without a deep sense of purpose or fulfillment. Getting to know yourself is a lifelong process because we continue growing and changing.

When you know yourself and have a strong sense of who you are and who God made you to be, you are less susceptible to allowing others to dictate what to feel and think. You are less likely to be taken advantage of because you’ll know your boundaries well enough to stand up for them.

Some practices to get to know yourself better might include:

Sit quietly and listen Being able to sit quietly and simply listen is hard. There are so many distractions, including our phones, emails, entertainment, other people, and so on. Sometimes we invite distractions so that we won’t dwell on uncomfortable or challenging thoughts. Take time apart, with your devices turned off, and just listen. Create room for the Holy Spirit to minister to you.

Journal Journaling can take many forms, including having a digital journal on your phone, in an app, or in a paper journal. The goal is to take time at the end of each day or week to think about what happened, how you felt about what happened, and how you reacted in those moments. Probing your thoughts and feelings helps you better understand what motivates you and what you care about.

You can also try to challenge yourself to do new things, being sure to note what you liked and what you didn’t. Getting yourself out of your comfort zone and having new experiences can help you learn more about who you are and what matters to you.

Spend time in solitude Spending time with yourself has many benefits, including taking you away from the immediacy of social pressures. When you’re by yourself and you sit quietly with your own thoughts, you have room to explore your feelings and ideas. You can spend time in solitude with Scripture to allow for God’s voice to speak loudest in those moments.

Christian Counseling in Rowlett, Texas

In addition to self-reflecting and journaling, you can also seek guidance from a Christian counselor in Rowlett, Texas. Your counselor can help you explore who you are and help you get to know yourself better. They can also help you identify and challenge the unhelpful stories you may be telling yourself about who you are. To learn more about how a Christian counselor in Rowlett can help, contact our office today at Texas Christian Counseling, Rowlett.

Photo:
“Heather”, Courtesy of Nicola Nuttall, Unsplash.com, CC0 License

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Articles are intended for informational purposes only and do not constitute medical advice; the content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. All opinions expressed by authors and quoted sources are their own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the editors, publishers or editorial boards of Stone Oak Christian Counseling. This website does not recommend or endorse any specific tests, physicians, products, procedures, opinions, or other information that may be mentioned on the Site. Reliance on any information provided by this website is solely at your own risk.

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