Understanding Toxic Masculinity and the Need for Christian Based Counseling

Toxic masculinity is deeply rooted in the roles that have been traditional for men to follow. It is an extreme idea of what it means to be manly. It is consumed with domination and aggression.

This behavior is not only harmful to others, but it can also have mental health effects on men. This toxic behavior can have serious repercussions. Christian based counseling can help identify the behaviors and help treat toxic masculinity.

But I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God. – 1 Corinthians 11:3, NIV

What Is Toxic Masculinity?

Throughout the years the definition of toxic masculinity has changed. Toxic masculinity can be defined as aspects of exaggerated masculinity characteristics that are antisocial and harmful, and foster domination, violence, and devaluation.

These traits are often associated with a negative impact on men, women, and society in general. This mentality, or thought process, goes beyond the typical tough-guy behavior.

Toxic masculinity doesn’t refer to all the behaviors of masculinity. It concentrates on those behaviors that are related to harmful and derogatory behaviors, typically those associated with sexual dominance or violence.

It is vital to note that masculinity is not bad or toxic, it is the potentially harmful standards that have been set for men. Men who participate in individual counseling can overcome toxic masculinity and enjoy a well-balanced lifestyle.

What Are the Most Common Traits Connected To Toxic Masculinity?

The traits that are associated with toxic masculinity are those that are opposite from the positive masculinity that is traditionally connected to manhood. Positive traits are those that foster loving and caring for others and defend moral truths, which are the opposite of the following traits of toxic masculinity.

Degrading emotion: Men who exhibit toxic masculinity degrade men and women who freely express their emotions. This mindset reflects a time when there were stereotypical behaviors for men and women. This expectation harms men because it blocks their ability to process emotions and confront traumas.

Values physical strength over character:  Men who value toxic masculinity often focus on physical strength as the definition of a man. They are consumed with workouts and bodybuilding more than intellectual pursuits.

Refuse to help with housework: If a man believes that housework is only for women, it may be a trait of toxic masculinity.

Accepts the sexualization of women: Toxic masculinity often views the sexualization of women as harmless. This means that women are regarded as objects of desire instead of individuals with rights and autonomy.

Unable to acknowledge weakness: There is a lack of willingness to admit their own weaknesses.

Treating spouse as inferior: This type of masculinity often fosters the mindset that men are superior to women and that men should be the controlling person in the home.

Embodies violence as a solution: Violence is a trait of toxic masculinity that can manifest in various behaviors. When it comes to solving problems, violence in the toxic masculinity mindset is the only way to prove who is right regardless of intellect.

Sexual aggression: One of the top traits of toxic masculinity is the behavior of sexual aggression. This is often seen in inappropriate touching and messaging as well as whistling at women.

Excessive risk-taking: Risky behavior that is linked to toxic masculinity is often a way to demonstrate manliness within a social group.

Gender bullying: This type of bullying occurs when men or boys bully other men or boys to achieve social standing by projecting themselves to be more aggressive and dominant.

Being Stoic: Men who adhere to a toxic masculinity mindset have the belief that they must be independent, physically tough, and self-reliant to be considered successful. If they are not, they are considered weak and will be ridiculed.

Fixated on body counts: In this situation, “body count” refers to the number of people a person has slept with. Men who have a toxic masculinity mindset believe that their value as a man is based on how many women they persuade into sleeping with them. This trait also reflects the mentality that women are merely objects to be conquered.

Christian Based Counseling Can Help

Toxic masculinity is the behaviors of men that are opposite of what it means to be a godly man. The mindset is that of dominance and control. There is a lack of respect for others, especially women. If you feel that you are the victim of toxic masculinity, contact our Christian counseling center to help you get started with individual counseling.