Individual Counseling

How to Implement Sabbath in Your Busy Life

By |2023-01-20T20:07:11+00:00January 7th, 2023|Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Spiritual Development|

Believers hear a lot about the importance of a Sabbath in their lives. In today’s busy world, it can be hard to find the time for the Sabbath, especially if you don’t understand just how helpful it can be. Sabbath goes beyond following a rule outlined in the Bible. It is a principle for wellness and a relationship with God. Even this, however, isn’t enough for many people. The reality is that implementing a Sabbath often feels impossible. But you can make a weekly Sabbath part of your life. But first, you need to understand it. What is Sabbath? The concept many are most familiar with is first introduced early in Genesis when the Bible describes creation. After the Bible describes the creation of the heavens and the earth, night and day, waters and sky, vegetation, sun and moon, sea creatures and birds, land animals, and finally man, all of creation is declared to be good. (Genesis 1) The first six days described are full of life, creation, and work. As we continue, something different happens: By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day, he rested from all his work. Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done. – Genesis 2:2-3, NIV This is the first time we see the concept of the Sabbath in the Bible though it isn't called that. It is simply God modeling the rhythm of work and rest. The very first idea of the Sabbath wasn’t introduced with rules dictated by God. It was modeled for us in the work and the rest of God. Since most people are reading translations of the Bible, it can be [...]

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Should I Get Married? Considerations for a Potential Partnership

By |2022-11-16T20:32:47+00:00November 16th, 2022|Featured, Individual Counseling, Premarital Counseling, Relationship Issues|

"Should I get married?" To borrow and paraphrase from a famed literary work, to marry or not to marry, that is the question. Like anything else, the consideration if we should get married, not simply when, is a heart matter to surrender to the Lord. However, that is not always the way that we operate when getting involved with a partner. We experience life’s rites of passage and organically connect with others in the process. Relationships form, but we don’t always ask the question of whether or not marriage is part of God’s plan for our lives. Society normalizes being in a relationship and can regard the unattached single as a novelty. Often, our families and culture socialize us into becoming part of a couple. Though well-intentioned, our loved ones may persist with questions and matchmaking attempts, as if something is deficient when we approach an age or reach an achievement milestone if we are not paired with a permanent partner. These influences filter through our subconscious, informing our emotions, and actions around the consideration of whether to marry or not. Although wise advisors shield us from misguided motives, the counsel of God’s voice speaking through His Word is the most critical response to the question, “Should I get married?” Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety. – Proverbs 11:14, ESV Should I Get Married? Where to Start One of the first and best steps to take is to reject the pressure to decide on marriage or singleness. God has already planned out each of the days that are written about you, which should be a fact that brings comfort and relief (Psalms 139:16; Philippians 1:6). There are wise principles in His Word to embrace as you consider the [...]

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Scripture About Worry: Finding Hope in God’s Word

By |2024-04-04T11:31:25+00:00September 29th, 2022|Anxiety, Featured, Individual Counseling, Spiritual Development|

Worrying is a normal human reaction caused by uncertainty or fear of things that are beyond one’s control. Most people want to feel like they are in control of their lives or certain aspects of them. Ironically, life by its very nature is uncertain, and for most people, this translates to having one or more things to worry about at any given time. Common things that people worry about include their own or their loved one’s health, finances, employment issues, and relationships. Worry is not just limited to circumstances, but it can extend to things happening in the bigger world around us. The mainstream news adds to the worry list as they expose crime, inflation, rising costs of living, wars, civil unrest in different parts of the world, natural disasters, hunger and famine, and climate change. For the past few years, the COVID-19 pandemic has also been a significant driver of worry. People were worried about whether they or their loved ones would contract the virus and if they did, whether they would survive it. Healthcare workers were caught between worrying about the welfare of their patients and worrying about their safety in the workplace. People worried about vaccines and whether there would be enough for everyone and whether they were safe to take. People worried about losing their jobs and those that lost their jobs continue to worry about their livelihoods. Given all this, it is easy for one to be consumed by fear which in turn leads to worrying. Does worry change things? There is a famous saying by Erma Bombeck which says, “worry is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do but never gets you anywhere.” What this means is, worrying does not prevent bad things from happening. Instead of losing yourself in [...]

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Living with OCD: Types and Treatment Options

By |2023-09-20T11:27:25+00:00September 14th, 2022|Featured, Individual Counseling, OCD|

Do you feel like everything must be in order, so you don’t panic? Is your main reason for cleaning your house based on the fear of germs? This doesn’t mean you are one of the millions of people living with obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). Over the years we have become flippant about the use of the term OCD. This mental health issue is not something to take lightly as it affects so much of daily life. However, you don’t need to feel like you are alone in your struggle with OCD, since many people struggle with symptoms of OCD in their everyday life. What is OCD? Obsessive-compulsive disorder is a result of decreasing anxiety to certain triggers. These triggers can be various thoughts, places, actions, or words that create anxiety due to an experience in the past. Whatever the cause, OCD is not just peculiar behavior. It can be complex and sometimes hard to diagnose. These obsessive-compulsive behaviors can have a huge impact on the daily life of someone who has been diagnosed with OCD. Obsessive-compulsive disorder is a mental health issue. It requires a medical diagnosis. When a person is obsessive, he or she experiences intruding or repetitive thoughts or urges that can create stress. The compulsion aspect is when a person is repetitive in a particular action or ritual. A person with OCD may exhibit one or both of these behaviors. Learning to recognize these patterns in behavior is key to understanding how to function with OCD. Main Dimensions or Types of OCD There are four main categories, called dimensions, of OCD. A person may be classified in one or more of these types of obsession or compulsion. These occur over time and rarely change. It is how a person tends to live based on beliefs due to [...]

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Combatting Anxiety with 7 Bible Verses About Fear

By |2024-04-04T11:33:38+00:00July 28th, 2022|Anxiety, Featured, Individual Counseling, Spiritual Development|

We are all afraid of something. Whether it be fear of the future, the unknown, illness, loss, or even what others think of us, anxiety is an inevitable part of life. In 2020 Chapman University surveyed a group of 1,035 adults in the United States to better understand the fears of the average American at that time. The survey results showed that the following circumstances are what they most commonly feared: Corrupt government officials at 79.6% People they love dying at 58.5% A loved one contracting COVID19 at 58% Widespread civil unrest at 56.5% A pandemic or major epidemic Economic collapse at 54.8% Pollution of oceans, rivers, and lakes at 50.8% Biological warfare at 49.3% Just looking at the above list, there must be a fear we each relate to. Fear is a natural part of life and is an emotion that can help protect us from harm. But when we allow fear to rule our lives and become chronic, that’s when it might be time to reevaluate. In today’s blog, we are going to explore the positive side of fear, chronic fear and its effects, Bible verses about fear and what the Word of God has to say on the subject, and two simple ways to battle fear with faith. The Positive Side of Anxiety We tend to think that being afraid makes us weak. But actually, feeling fear is completely natural and can even save our lives. The positive side of fear is often overlooked as we try to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps and fight them in our own strength. But what if we chose to let the fear in a little, sit with it for a minute, as we held it up to the light of God’s loving presence? Maybe acknowledging what we fear [...]

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Overcoming Depression: Learning How to Manage It and Remain in Control

By |2023-09-20T11:30:51+00:00July 6th, 2022|Depression, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Everyone has a bad day now and then, but depression can make every day a bad day. Depression feels like a hopeless loop of endless negative thoughts that sap your vitality and your motivation and can make the very thought of doing something that you know could help you feel better to seem too exhausting or impossible.It can be so debilitating that it becomes physically disabling. Even simple things like walking around the block or picking up the phone to call a friend may feel like more than you can handle. This makes overcoming depression much more difficult. “[Depression] essentially hijacks the prefrontal cortex, the part of our brain that enables us to use logic and think clearly, and shapes our thoughts and worldviews to be incredibly negative and hopeless.” – Max Maisel, Ph.D. Although you can’t just will yourself to snap out of depression, there are ways to break through it. The following are some positive things you can do that will help boost your mood and increase your energy. Do as many of them as you can each day. If you are consistent and keep on keeping on even when you don’t feel motivated or in the mood to do so, it will get easier and you will, in time, feel the heavy cloud of depression start to lift, and feel happier, healthier, and more hopeful to boot. It may be difficult at first, but difficult does not mean impossible. Just take that first step. Overcoming depression one baby step at a time Find small ways to be of service to others. Doing something for someone, being a volunteer, brightening someone’s day by giving them a compliment, or even just smiling and being kind can all boost your mood and be of help in overcoming depression. Care [...]

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12 Examples of Gaslighting in Relationships

By |2024-04-04T11:35:45+00:00June 22nd, 2022|Couples Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Gaslighting in relationships is a form of emotional abuse. It is a destructive and manipulative tactic by an abuser to keep a victim off balance. When someone is being gaslighted, they are persuaded to believe something patently false or to question something true. If you are regularly being gaslighted by someone, this can take an enormous toll on your psychological well-being. But you can gain help, perspective, and practical tools for overcoming this problem when you meet with a Christian counselor. How does gaslighting work? The term gaslighting comes from a play by the name gaslight which debuted in 1938 and was later turned into a film. In the original story, a man dimmed the gas lamps in increments but denied doing so to the woman. A woman's visual senses told her the lights were being dimmed, but she chose to believe the falsehood the man was telling her, and this eventually drove her crazy. An abuser uses this tactic of manipulating the truth to toy with their victim’s emotions, perception, memory, and sanity. It is a deliberate move to keep the victim under their control. But often, the abuser works in subtle ways so their insidious behavior will not be called out. Unfortunately, the subtle approach can make it difficult for the victim to know they are being gaslighted. People who use gaslighting in relationships do it to exert power over their victims. Sometimes they simply enjoy the twisted pleasure of feeling like a puppeteer over someone's life. They may also wish to gain emotional, physical, or financial power in the victim's life. 12 examples Here are several examples of gaslighting that occur in different types of relationships. 1. A man tells his wife that he loves her and had no intention of hurting her feelings, so she [...]

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4 Ways to Manage Anger and Why It’s Important

By |2024-04-04T11:37:32+00:00June 17th, 2022|Anger Issues, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Is it difficult for you to find ways to manage anger? Does it sometimes seem like anger is managing you? You have the power to learn how to manage anger, and you can get help by meeting with a Christian counselor. Why it is Important to Manage Anger You probably already understand why it is important to manage anger. Out-of-control anger costs you much in your relationships at home, work, and other places. You may know that your anger costs you but have yet to learn how to manage it well. Still, you may seek help because your anger has caused damage and distance in your relationships. You may be able to see evidence that anger is costing you in terms of relationships. But you may not see the damage it is doing to your mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual health. In these ways, anger exacts a high price. The mental price for anger can be a lack of concentration or obsessive thoughts linked to the source of your anger. the emotional price for your anger may be an inability to empathize with others and a lack of self-control. When left untreated, anger can morph into depression, which exacts an even higher price on your mental and emotional well-being. The physical price of anger can manifest in many ways. Anger may be causing you to experience insomnia, rapid heartbeats, raised blood pressure, gastrointestinal problems, immune system disorders, skin issues, weight gain or loss, and other problems. Unchecked anger can also lead to serious problems like stroke or heart disease. anger seeks an outlet, and if you do not deal with it properly, it will show up in your body. The spiritual price of anger can be a distance in your relationship with God. You may act out in anger [...]

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5 Stress Management Tips from a Christian Perspective

By |2023-09-20T11:34:06+00:00June 6th, 2022|Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Professional Development|

Stress management is important because daily stress exacts a heavy price on our overall health. It can cost us dearly in our work, relationships, physical health, and even spiritual wellbeing. We can all use more stress management tips to help manage our stress loads. Two Types of Stress Not all stress is bad in your life. You need some stress to push you toward meeting your goals. A little bit of stress related to a deadline can serve as a motivating factor. So, your goal should not be to eliminate this good type of stress, but cut out as much bad stress as possible. Bad stress is the kind that takes more than it gives. It is fueled by adrenaline and cortisol, hormones that work well in short-term situations but wreak havoc on our minds and bodies in the long term. We need to learn to control what we can about bad stress, so we limit its impact on us. Let’s look at a couple of examples. Some stressful situations just happen to us without our control – your car gets wrecked; you receive an unfavorable diagnosis; or a pipe freezes and bursts, flooding your house. These situations would be stressful to anyone, but your level of stress can be controlled by how intentionally you respond to these situations. You can admit that the situation causes you stress and take steps to actively manage it. Or you can allow your emotions to get out of control and cause you additional stress over the same situation. Some stressful situations can be prevented. You may be taking on more work than you can manage, spending more than your budget allows, or procrastinating your work tasks. These situations all cause stress, but they can be prevented by employing techniques of stress management. [...]

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